


I'll Send My Best Regards From Hell

by chewysugar



Series: You Are The Diamonds [3]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Bottom Sam, Daddy Issues, Drabble, Heavy Angst, Hurt Lucifer, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Inspired by Music, Loneliness, Lucifer's Cage, M/M, Madness, Marina and the Diamonds, Masturbation, Top Lucifer (Supernatural)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-22
Updated: 2018-09-22
Packaged: 2019-07-15 14:29:09
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 504
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16065062
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chewysugar/pseuds/chewysugar
Summary: Tormented by loneliness, Lucifer's only method of defense against insanity is his hatred.





	I'll Send My Best Regards From Hell

**Author's Note:**

> Rated E for everything listed in the tags. 
> 
> Lyric from the song "Starring Role."

All he’d ever wanted was his family. How in any fucking way that made him different from the perfect, precious Winchester’s was beyond him. He’d tried to please, to be the good son, and it had never been enough.

Lucifer choked out a sob. These thoughts—these bitter resentments— were all the company he had. Here in this massive cage of bone and blood, the madness of his life circled through his brain. Broken in spirit, all he could do was think the same thoughts, and feel the same hot rage and sinking despair.

It had been different when Sam had been here with him.

Poor, broken, begging Sammy.

Lucifer had used him as nothing more than a receptacle for all that hatred and frustration. Time being immaterial within the cage, he’d taken the once and former golden child in every way possible. Sam had even come to like it towards the end.

Nothing had given Lucifer more pleasure than to gaze heavenwards while buried balls deep in his panting little bitch.

_How do you like this, you neglectful fuck? And you too, Deano. How does it feel to know that I’ve got your little brother on his knees?_

But it hadn’t lasted nearly long enough. Sam had been stolen away, and without the solace of his tight heat, or his sheer company, the anger and grief had burrowed in. Now, naked and shivering in the darkness, Lucifer could only curse his existence.

He’d laughed, cried and frothed at the mouth until exhaustion had claimed him. Even in this prison, he hadn’t been able to ascertain any kind of victory. Sam had fallen into the Cage of his own volition, and yet he had been freed.

But not Lucifer. Never Lucifer.

He tried to drown himself in thoughts of pleasant things: of pain and suffering. He tried to coax his flesh to recall the feeling of Sam—of that hot little mouth and pliant, sinewy body. Sometimes it worked. Sometimes he would make believe that Sam hadn’t been plucked from the Cage. He would talk to the air, and fuck his fist until his muscles ached.

He just wanted someone to be there with him—someone for himself. He wanted to be the star in someone’s sky, and yet all he ever seemed to be was alone.

_I hate you_ , he thought—to his father, his brothers, the Winchester’s, humanity and himself. _I hate you, I hate you, I hate you..._

But hating would only expend energy he could save for anything else in the world. He couldn’t afford to hate anymore, not when it accomplished absolutely nothing.

Let them cast him out. Let them leave. What did he care? If they wanted to make an unfeeling maniac out of him, then they’d succeeded.

Lucifer collapsed against, what passed in the Cage as, the ground. He stared with unseeing eyes at the unfeeling worlds outside his prison.

_I don’t care_ , he thought with a smile. _I don’t care, I don’t care, I don’t care..._

**Author's Note:**

> Let me know what you think!


End file.
